I flat out refused to rip out all of this AGAIN and set it aside overnight, glaring at the fun fur as I stowed it in a dark corner. Bad yarn. No donut for you.
But wait. I have a sewing machine. I could steek this sucker! People steek every day and come out completely unscathed and sane. This was going to get felted anyway, so nothing should show in the end. If worse came to worse, I'd just have to start over. Nothing to lose. So I gritted my teeth and started to sew. Sewing is easy. I do that all the time.
But what about the cutting??? Please excuse the blurriness of this picture. I believe my hands were shaking just a wee bit. Nerves. Cutting knitted yarn on purpose just seems so....wrong, so horrible, I had a hard time keeping my hand still.
I untwisted the yarn, grabbed a needle and black thread, and whipstitched the ends back together. You can just barely see where the ends meet in the middle of the picture above. Not a chance it'll show once everything is felted. And now I have technically steeked, albeit not exactly on purpose. I've steeked and lived to tell the tale and didn't have to frog over a thousand stitches. Nice.
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